Regulars

collection of seashells
FeaturesJay KernerRegulars
The Regular Joe

100 Beaches in a Bowl

Someday, in I hope the far distant future, somebody will throw out the glass bowl that currently sits on a shelf in our bathroom. While it means the world to me, both literally and figuratively, it will sadly be near worthless to anybody else after we’re gone. Though I won’t be surprised if they dump it and keep the bowl.

It’s filled with sand and seashells mostly, with a few tiny coral pieces mixed in, and a generous sprinkling of colorful sea glass. They’re the treasures of maybe a hundred perfect days with my family, on some beach or another.

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handmade Christmas ornament dolls from 1960s
FeaturesJay KernerRegulars
The Regular Joe

Playing With Dolls

Somewhere around ten or twelve, it became my job to put up my grandmother’s Christmas trees. She had three. One in each of her second story picture windows, and a third, downstairs in her beauty salon on St. Joe Avenue.
There was a big, fake one, a smaller fake one, and the fakiest of all, the aluminum with the colored light wheel. She rotated them around from year to year.
But one constant was her Character Dolls. One of her customers made them. Fairy tale icons mostly. Robin Hood’s in there. So is Bo Peep. And the Jolly Green Giant for some reason.

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black and white closeup of water coming from a faucet
FeaturesJay Kerner
The Regular Joe

Talking S*** About Sewers

I value my sewer connection. Let me be clear on that!
I think sanitation is what separates us from the lesser beasts. (Though some are certainly separated further than others.)
But modern sanitation ain’t a walk in the park.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful to go back to those halcyon days, when you could just dump your waste in the river? Arrogantly thumbing our noses at anybody downstream, and blessedly ignorant of anybody above.
But these days, we handle our s*** differently.

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close up of man and woman's dancing feet in dress shoes
FeaturesJay Kerner
The Regular Joe

Let’s Dance!

We used to dance. Most people did.
Dancing cut across all divisions and divides. Young, old. North, south. Regardless of color or station. Rich folks danced in palaces, built for the purpose. Po’ folks danced when they had nothing else.
But, one of the things I never thought I’d see in my lifetime, is the slow demise of dancing.

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